Tuesday, March 20, 2012

and then there was love.

i have this super vivid memory of my baby sister sitting at my table in grass valley. she had just made me grilled chicken and grilled veggies, and was teaching me to not eat after 7 pm. my little campbell couldn't have been more than 5 months old. her hair was long. my hair was long. she was happy. and content. and i was asking her, as she picked at her grilled chicken, if she was ready to start nursing school. and she just said, "oh, no, steven and i want to have a baby."
campbell turns 6 in just 2 weeks. and Hope is just 5 days old.
talk about waiting on the Lord. talk about:

i am still confident of this: i will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord, be strong and take heart, and wait for the Lord.
Psalm 27:13-14

5 long years. and in an instant, forgotten. well, not totally forgotten. but you realize, when you see how someone waits, and wait, and waits for what they want- joy. pure joy.
and my sister and steven, they waited. and many, many babies were born. and they waited on the Lord. many heartaches were had. and they waited.
and do you know what they got? sure, Hope.
but HOPE.
they found themselves, and their trust in our Lord. they learned what it meant to put complete trust in our Savior, and that even if He didn't give them the desires of their heart- as quickly as they wanted it- they still would call Him Lord. they still would Love Him.
and. they found each other. two "kids" when they were married. they had years together, waiting on the Lord, and growing together. growing in Him, and growing in love.
i know my sister loves her husband. its pretty evident. because she is my sister, we share a lot.
but, i didn't realize just how much her husband loved her, until i watched him while she was in labor.
and honestly, i have never witnessed a man who loved his wife more. the pain she felt was bore on his face. her contractions were felt by his expressions. her hand was always held. he whispered in her ear, prayed for her, touched her belly, rubbed her back.
and he never left her side.
i am not sure if that man peed in 36 hours.
i know he didn't sleep. and even i stole 2 hours.
it brings tears to my eyes, just thinking about it. the devotion in this man. for someone that i love so dearly. the concern and care that was in his eyes. the never ending support that he gave her.
it was the most beautiful thing i have yet to see in my life.
until that baby was born.
nothing went as planned. but it is the Lord's plan, not ours. it is His timing, not ours. it is His will, and we are His children.
and even when every single thing these two wanted was slowly disappearing from their grasp, steven stood strong in His trust of His Savior, and his devotion to my sweet sister.
and when i would catch his glance during contractions, i just knew. he loved her. he really loved her.
and then that baby.
that beautiful baby. that baby that resembles her daddy. this sweet little Hope that has been waited for, for so many years, was here.
and i have never seen a man cling so tight to a baby. hold a child so completely in his arms.
my sister said that if he was going to hold her, he'd have to do skin to skin. she said it was less than seconds that he had whipped his sweatshirt off and reached out for that baby.
his daughter. her daughter.
i was so privileged to be a part of this. to watch the transition, from desire of a baby, to struggle for a baby, to trusting for a baby. i remember praying with my sister after the first set of shots. i remember when she called me with the news. LEAPING off my couch. shaking with joy.
i was the first person, outside of hospital staff and her sweet parents to hold this beautiful baby.
and i couldn't be more in love.
however. my sister, she loves this baby. she coos with this baby, she snuggles this baby, she texts me constantly about this baby.
and steven. his world is this baby.
and my sister.
i am deep gratitude and praise to my Savior, for staying truthful to His Word. He does give us the desires of our heart. He does.

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