Reflections

My new baby is a week old.  Sigh.  I feel a little like this first week was robbed from me.  Spending 36 extra hours at the hospital was not part of the plan at all!  You can read more about that here (if you want)

Pregnancy is just the strangest thing.  It completely consumes your life.  Everything you do revolves around the growing baby in your belly.  All your thoughts, prayers and wishes- just everything becomes about the belly for 9 1/2 long long long long long months.

And then in a brief moment its all over.

Pregnancy feels like it lasts forever, labor comes and then the baby is there. Forever.

He's here and he is beautiful.  And he truly consumes all my time- because I want him to right now.  I am trying hard to make sure I am not completely ignoring my other children, but that is why Sam has taken a lot of time off- to make sure I have the time to sit and watch my baby.

Which is why I haven't really been here in the blog world.  Because when it comes to wanting to put Henry down and pick up the computer, well I barely want to do it.  

This time is so quick.  And then it too is over.

And thinking that Henry will soon be walking around, chasing his brother and sister makes we want to sit and cry for a little while.

And makes me want another baby.  Shush- don't tell.

But i know Sam really doesn't want any more kids.  So, I am just praying.  Not that I'll get pregnant (because, man i hate being pregnant) but that I will be content with what the Lord has given me.  And if the Lord wants to give this little family another child to love, I will welcome that, and if the Lord wants me to focus on these 3 little miracles and my husband, then I will continue to be blessed by that.

It is just hard, because I feel internally engineered to produce children.  My hearts desire to be a mother, but that doesn't mean there is a number that equates to that desire.

Oh- and this feeling changes almost as quickly as I change Henry's diapers.  When Campbell is melting down, and Mason is screaming from a diaper change, I can't imagine one more child.

Content in any situation.  With any situation.  

I am so blessed.

Momma and Henry

Henry is here!

yup, that's right.  as i posted my last post (on Sunday afternoon) i was secretly hoping to be meeting that little guy real soon- and i did- less than 12 hours after my post!  more details to come later (when Campbell is pressing limits with his will and Mason isn't trying to share oatmeal with me via my knee), but here is a tiny gist- and a quick little pic at my new boy.

Henry Levi Nies, born March 23, 2009 at 12:38 am

8 lbs 6 oz (YUP I WAS RIGHT!) and 20 1/2 inches long (so close!)

He's beautiful.  And I am in love.

And tired.

And generally happy.

6 days to go!

So, yesterday marked the 1 week to go mark for us.  Hard to believe, but it is true.  As of today, I have six days that I am counting down.  I will not reveal to many pre labor details in this post, but things are moving along, and I am hoping to be snuggling Henry in my arms before too long.

So how did I do this week?

week 2

finish Jana's baby gift- well I didn’t really start this. I have cut out some of the fabric, and I know what I am making for this little boy.  But Jana’s baby shower isn’t going to be until the end of May, and I took a closer look at what needed to be done, and knew this could get moved for a bit.  I don’t think I will have a very long sewing gap, because I am too addicted to it right now!

finish Gaia's birthday gift-  Gaia’s birthday also is several weeks off, not until cinco de mayo! so, I did get all the materials (except some padding) cut out for her 2 gifts, but this will be held off until middle of April?

make fun totes- well, originally this meant fun totes for me! Cause I wanted to be able to have various sized cute totes and drawstring bags for different projects and purposes.  However, last week at Joann’s I found this wonderful animal fabric that I had to have- because it had a giraffe, elephant, and a lion on it (only those 3 animals, and they aren’t whimsical- they are really retro and cute) and these are the animals that I have assigned to all 3 kids.  So I decided to make 3 totes, and embroider each kiddos name onto the tote (and these will be their “Easter bags”).  They are started, and soon they may be done!

work on Campbell's homeschooling folder- I have printed out a bunch of worksheets for Campbell, I just need to hole punch and put in a binder.  However, I want to do a fun craft with Campbell to decorate the binder.

work on Mother's Day gifts- I should be working on this, but this will be easy to do while sitting on the couch, staring at my new beautiful baby boy!

work on van basket- nah, but I did get my carseats professionally installed at CHP- and I am so happy that I did! They are not moving at all!

finish Campbell's Easter pants- YES! DONE! I am so happy I got to this.  Henry won’t have matching pants, but I am really happy I have a little pair of pants for Campbell.

 Added from last week:

follow up with healthy families- called and faxed additional information, and YES- she has been approved and I got her insurance card yesterday! So thrilled about this.

do my recert for medi-cal- YES! Mailed out Saturday morning!

Maybe work on window frame- again, no.  but hey, I gave myself 10 weeks.  Maybe during Sam’s 10 weeks off we can work on it together!

Campbell flash cards- finally purchased index cards, so ½ way done!

Print out my lists (kids and diapers)- YES! DONE!

Maybe make Mason a little dress and kitty (maybe)- nope

Finish packing my hospital bag- YES DONE!

Burp cloths for Henry- YES DONE!

Addie’s birthday gift- YES DONE!!!!

Last Week:

Well I don’t really know what I want to do this week.  I am really hoping that the baby will come and come soon!  I think I will really just take it easy.

How’s about I just check back in and let you know what I get done from this day on? 

 

Summer of 69 Thrift Store Refashion Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!

Summer of 69 Thrift Store Refashion Frock GIVEAWAY!!!!

why can't i do this??? 

new finds

usually i will not spend more than 3.48 on clearance items.  i try hard to stay under that price range.  however, 2 things got me to deviate from my usual price limit and spend (wait for it) 6.48 on one item!

1) i had been watching this little brown dress for months! wishing and waiting for it to go clearance.  and then here it was, hanging in the clearance section- with only 2 other buddies (they had gone fast!) now, it was only in size 18 months ( i would have preferred to buy 2T or 3T). 

2) i didn't know if the size would work seasonally, but i just loved this dress, and realized that it could be worn as a tunic style top later.  it was originally 9.99 down to 6.48, not a slamming steal... but i realized that it could be worn for longer... on my short little gal, and then handed down to another little one we borrow clothes from.

so without further adieu:

sorry there isn't a better picture, mason wasn't so on board for modeling.  and yes, she has a little cut on her eye- poor baby.  that was the result of sam trying to get her dressed while she was on the run.
anyways- i just love the little tulips! and i love love love brown! see how long this is on mason? all the way to the floor.  she'll be wearing this for a long time! i am so happy that i bought it, that i went ahead and spent almost 7 dollars.

my real steal were these little pants:

i just love the little tulips (obviously) and these little pants were only 2.48.  again, i debated- because we are moving into the summer months (eventually, well i guess in 4 months) and mason is still so tiny (these are an 18 months size and i rolled them up at the bottom) so she can wear them for the rest of spring, and then if they stay comfy in the waist, i can turn them into shorts.... maybe...

the place for my new finds? target of course!

booties for henry

and yet another amy butler project, again from the little stitches book.  these little booties are part of the little get up that i will be bringing henry home from the hospital in.  i might want to throw some socks in his bag, just in case these don't fit so well.

but i am happy they are done!

an old finished project

a little bag i made for my friend jana's birthday. this is the amy butler birdie sling i can finally post pictures of it, because i gave it to her yesterday.  i am in love with this fabric.  and the one day down the road i will be making a skirt out of the same orange fabric that is being used for the band.

happy birthday jana!

just here waiting...

yup, just waiting.  i've set up henry's little cradle in our room.  the bottom shelf is stocked with diapers (disposable for the first few days, until they run out and until i feel like doing cloth diaper laundry) and wipes, and receiving blankets.

next to my side of the bed is a little basket with burp cloths and nuks.

all that is missing is henry.

i am putting in a little guess for myself:

i have no idea when he is coming (wish it were yesterday)

but when he does:
i'm thinking 8 lbs 6 oz, 21 inches long, and a little fuzz of red hair.

we shall see.

oh henry, come soon please.

two weeks and counting

yippee 2 weeks to go!

yippee 2 weeks to go!

yippee and yikes! i have such mixed emotion. i don't feel ready for anything most days, the house is a disaster, i'm on the couch exhausted, sewing projects are strewn all over the house.

but then i don't care.  i don't want to spend time cleaning, because it will still be such a mess regardless, because i just don't see how it will possibly be perfectly prepared for when henry comes.

i'm hoping nesting will actually happen (not just the mental nesting i having racing through my mind)

 

but here's my 3 week recap:

make Mason's Easter skirt**Done! and this is actually an Easter dress.  As soon as i have a room with great light, i will be posting pictures.

make my Wrap Skirt** DONE! this is finished as well! 

make picture hanging for Campbell- not started, i might need Sam's help.

start Gaia's birthday gift-  i printed off the instructions for part of the gift and found the fabric I will use.

pack hospital bag- started this! Finally.  I need to wash a couple of items, but it is almost done.

start Campbell's Easter pants- washed the fabric for this and cut out the pants- this should sew up quickly.

added from last week:

make Henry's booties** Done! whoo hoo!

follow up with healthy families- almost done, i did call, and i have the paperwork i now need, i just need to call and get a fax number.

work a little on Jana's baby gift (if there is time)- i traced this pattern, and washed and dried part of the fabric, and cut out 1/3 of the gift.

maybe work a little on the window frame- this just isn't going to get done.

filling out my medi-cal recert package- thought about it.

 pack a bag for my kids.  not sure how i forgot about this.- **Done (ish) there are a few things that will need to get added to the bag on the day the kids leave (but that is in the little list I have made)

 make a list of all the things my kids need, but can't be waiting in the bag (plus location of where those things are )- did this, but need to print it out and put in by the front door.

 instructions on how to wash my cloth diapers (because they can't just be sitting in the bucket for days while i am at the hospital)- did this, need to print it out and tape it to the wash machine

 make a list of what i need for the hospital that i can't keep packed (aka my fan and our camera) I need to just put a little post note by the door- I only need my fan, camera and chapstick.

 make a phone list of who needs to be called when i am having the baby... i'm giving it to you Serena, but just to call when i go to the hospital- and i'll put little notes next to the names so you can tell so and so to call these 3 people- etc.  that way it isn't all on one person.- done and emailed to Serena! Thanks!

 make a gift for another person- another friend's child is turning one this month, and i forgot.-i pulled out the fabric, and know what i am going to do.

 Campbell's party:  we are postponing this until May.

 i need to make some burp cloths for little Henry.

Not a lot, but some. - made one and will make a couple more, and got some beautiful green flannel ones from Serena- thank you!!!

 i found this great kitty fabric in my stash, and now i want to make mason a little dress out of it, and a matching little kitty stuffed animal for Easter.... when to do this... still just a dream.

 and flash cards- i need to make Campbell some matching sight word flash cards and then make him so rhyming word flash cards... nope.

 and then for this week:

 week 2

finish Jana's baby gift

finish Gaia's birthday gift

make fun totes

work on Campbell's homeschooling folder

work on Mother's Day gifts

work on van basket

finish Campbell's Easter pants

 

so to add from last week:

follow up with healthy families

do my recert for medi-cal

Maybe work on window frame

Campbell flash cards

Print out my lists (kids and diapers)

Maybe make Mason a little dress and kitty (maybe)

Finish packing my hospital bag

Burp cloths for Henry

Addie’s birthday gift

 

I sure do keep adding it on.  I wonder if I should start panicking as to what would happen if some of it doesn’t get done???  Nothing other than the medi-cal and healthy families is truly tragic, I mean gifts can be given late, flash cards made at any time, etc.  I am really just trying to keep myself occupied.  And I do enjoying have to do lists, so this isn’t painful.

I’ll try to give a little midweek assessment again- because I do think I can most likely get a bunch of stuff done tomorrow.

sorry the color and fonts are so crazy, i'm to tired to really address the issue.

friday five

1) Why are children’s books not consistently illustrated correctly?  When the author describes something in their words and there is not a picture that correlates to that affect, a 2 ½ year old is quite confused.  And frustrated.  Which makes for a frustrated mother.

2) The stupid things I do.  Why do you try and try to pry a box out of a lid (I slipped a box into the lid, and the lid would not come off) before you check to see if maybe the lid is actually on your piano, and the box is just pretty, and not actually stuck inside your lid.

3) Why do people put corn in so many things?  It’s an unpleasant surprise, and really hard to pick out.  Its especially bothersome when its swimming buddy in food is chopped up onions. 

4) Bad things come in threes.  Last night in a matter of moments, I realized 1) I had grabbed the leftover salad from dinner- not my wonderful cheesecake 2) after realizing this my eyes were drawn to a strange thing moving on our chair in our living room- a new kind of strange bug 3) after noticing the new bug on the back of the chair, my eyes then next go to the HUGE crouching spider on our wall. 

5) Watching your child run at you from across a gymnastic floor with their eyes open wide and huge silly grins on their faces is one of the greatest things in the world.  

an almost midweek assessment

i have 18 days till my due date.  18 days.  i wish it were more like 18 hours.  however, i technically still have awhile before i can start crawling at the walls. technically.  i started crawling at the walls about 3 weeks ago.  yup.

however, life keeps handing more time consuming projects to do.  here is what i'm hoping to do this week:

 week 3

make Mason's Easter skirt

make my Wrap Skirt

make picture hanging for Campbell

start Gaia's birthday gift

pack hospital bag

start Campbell's Easter pants

added from last week:

make Henry's booties

follow up with healthy families

work a little on Jana's baby gift (if there is time)

maybe work a little on the window frame

now i have made some progress on some of these items, but why would i give away my progress early- i'm drawing out the anticipation for myself.

but what do i need to add? what other things are quickly flying into my mind and must be written down before i forget? the following:

apparently i need to fill out a re certification for my own medi-cal benefits.  this is absolutely ridiculous.  you aren't supposed to need to recert for a year, and i haven't had my benefits a year.  so now i have to gather all the information and get it down? what? awesome.

pack a bag for my kids.  not sure how i forgot about this.

make a list of all the things my kids need, but can't be waiting in the bag (plus location of where those things are )

instructions on how to wash my cloth diapers (because they can't just be sitting in the bucket for days while i am at the hospital)

make a list of what i need for the hospital that i can't keep packed (aka my fan and our camera)

make a phone list of who needs to be called when i am having the baby... i'm giving it to you Serena, but just to call when i go to the hospital- and i'll put little notes next to the names so you can tell so and so to call these 3 people- etc.  that way it isn't all on one person.

make a gift for another person- another friend's child is turning one this month, and i forgot.

i think i may cancel Campbell's party.  i've only told one person.  i'm just getting tired.  i don't know what to do.  i could do it in May, he won't know.  he won't know if i don't do it all.

so maybe i will just do it next week, but only with the one invited guest (you know who you are).  all i want are balloons and cupcakes and the fun sparkle in his eye.

don't i get one more year before he knows what is going on? and then when he realizes that i need to do it for his brother and sister?

i need to make some burp cloths for little Henry.

Not a lot, but some.

i found this great kitty fabric in my stash, and now i want to make mason a little dress out of it, and a matching little kitty stuffed animal for Easter.... when to do this...

and flash cards- i need to make Campbell some matching sight word flash cards and then make him so rhyming word flash cards...

those last 3 were added here at 2 am...

well, i think that's about it.  still feels like i am forgetting some things.  guess it doesn't matter.  i have officially become unmotivated.  

i need boy patterns!

i remembered a cute, cute thing my son Campbell said to me two days ago.

we were hanging out in the living room, and he turns to me and says, "can we put aprons on and make heart cookies?"

can we put on aprons?  i made Campbell an apron for Christmas, and the fact that he wants to wear it just makes me so happy.  it gives me so much joy to make handmade gifts, and to make something that Campbell actually will wear- and sees that we use it for cooking.

why boy patterns? because i want to sew more things for my boy here, and for the boy to come... and i am coming up with nothing! help please!

butterfly kimono

i figured just showing pictures of the finished project on my ironing board wouldn't cut it.  here's my first kimono top.  i did unfortunately mess it up a tad ( there should be 4 bias straps, not 2) but it still works, and now i know how to do it right.  

i think the top looks super cute.  but i think my little lady here is much cuter.

i am bias.

like the tape.

Down to 3

Somehow i am looking at 3 weeks to go.  And now i am starting to freak out, internally at least.  labor and pain and recovery.  making sure the other 2 kids are happy while i'm in the hospital (having there stuff ready for them), trying to have this house somewhat clean.  oh, how my mind begins to reel.  nursing again, recovering from labor, sleepless nights, and the shocking adjustment of a new baby when i still have a baby.

i kinda want to sit and hide under a blanket.  oh man.

 

well lets pretend to recap what i got done this week:

 

week 4

put up pictures- **DONE there are new pictures hanging in our hallway! it only took 14 months, but there are finally pictures hanging of Mason.  Campbell likes looking at the new pictures.

finish picture window with frames- ha, this didn't even get started.  well, it kinda did. i bought some paper for backing the frame, and then i did upload pictures that i want to print out for the frame, but i still need to order them.  so this was kinda started, but i'm moving it a low priority of sorts. i just realized that the paper i bought is a little short of the window frames, so i'll have to improvise what i want to do.

make Campbell's backpack ** DONE! i will post pictures on it later.  i am pretty happy with it, however with the pattern, the picture in the book made it look so much bigger than it turned out.  so if i ever decide to do this project again, i will have to make my measurements much bigger.

finish Henry's hospital bag ** DONE!

start Jana's baby gift- this is another one that may move to a lower priority.  Jana's baby isn't due until June 23 and i am guessing i'll be up to sewing more in May, so i may need to shift this on the list. however, i have bought the fabric for the project, and traced the pattern for 2 parts of it (and i know what i am making, so that is half the battle)

follow up with healthy families-i didn't even bother to call.  i was hoping to get something in the mail from them, but alas- i did not.

finish pictures in kids room- i don't remember what this means, i did change some pictures in the room, so i think i would call this one **DONE!

do top shelf frames** DONE! I painted picture frames and put 2 new pictures in 2 of the frames, i am waiting for one more picture (henry's)

added from last week:

finish Meaghen's baby gift** DONE! i will take pictures of the finished blanket.  i did drop 2 projects from the list, but i have 4 bought things for her, and i did make 3 semi pretty things for her.

finish Kris's birthday gift** DONE! i will take pictures of her finished gift.  i am not thrilled with the second part of her gift, i really wish i could sew a tad straighter, but apparently i cannot.

Henry's booties- i have all the fabric i need for the booties, and i have cut out 1/3 of the project.

hang other item** DONE!

register at hospital** DONE!

plan my big boys birthday party! **DONE! but there are still things that need to be done in prep for it.  however, i realized i just want to have a quiet little lunch party for him.  however, i want balloons, streamers, and other decorations all set up for him.  i want to make him a special little lunch and cupcakes, and make sure he knows just how special i want his day to be.

 week 3

make Mason's Easter skirt

make my Wrap Skirt

make picture hanging for Campbell

start Gaia's birthday gift

pack hospital bag

start Campbell's Easter pants

added from last week:

make Henry's booties

follow up with healthy families

work a little on Jana's baby gift (if there is time)

maybe work a little on the window frame

when did i learn this?

irony is found in this short little story.

tonight while searching through home-schooling worksheets for my son, i found a little vocab sheet that mentions when to use "a" and "an".

well, i was simply blown away, because i never realized there was a rule.  i just figured i always used it incorrectly.

the rule is:

its "a" when it is used before a consonant.

its "an" when it is used before a vowel.

and the sky opened up and sun shined down on my keyboard.

apparently i am the last person in the world to learn this.

campbell probably already knows.

so glad, i learn a great rule that everyone knows while researching the things i will be home-schooling my child. so glad.

my husband informed me that i do speak correctly.  however, when you only have young children to talk to all day i highly doubt that.

oh well. i am sure this was taught to me while i was reading a book not paying attention.  apparently i had the foresight to know that i would live my adult days in a time where microsoft word has my bad grammar back.

hmmm. well i find irony.

Sunday Laundry Shirt Dress GIVEAWAY!!!!

Sunday Laundry Shirt Dress GIVEAWAY!!!!

this dress is just beautiful... 

Serena- if you win, can we share???

a little project

i do wish this had been on my list of things to do because i would get great joy in proudly marking it off the list.  i think i have said before that items continue to get added, even though only mentally added.  a little boy in mine (and Campbell's) Sunday School class has a birthday in just a few weeks (turning 3 just a few days before Campbell does), and i have it on good authority that Campbell has been added to the list of birthday guests.  i knew a fun and practical gift would be coloring books, coloring pencils and some paint.  however, i wanted to do something handmade as well.

here is what i did:

the lines on the outside pocket (the little slots for the colored pencils) are by no means straight, but i am assuming a three year old won't care.  however i do want to make a straighter one the next time i attempt this little project again.  also, i realized that after i had made and sewn the pocket onto the tote that the pocket was WAY to long (the colored pencils disappeared).

so i grabbed my trusty and all to used seam ripper and i pulled out the bottom part of the pocket, cut it off and then zig zagged the remainder of the pocket.

not the cleanest looking project, but i like it. especially the fun cars and trucks fabric.

a reflection of sorts

in one of my very first posts i mentioned how reading through the Bible in one year was one of the "books" i wanted to read.  earlier tonight when i thought about doing this post i was going to brag about how i proud i am for keeping up on my daily readings.  then i checked the list of what to read on each day and realized i am a chapter (or two) behind.  hmmm.  just more to read tomorrow.  or later today i suppose.

today, this passage really stood out to me.

Deuteronomy 8: 2-5

And you shall remember that the LORD your God led you all the way these forty years in the wilderness, to humble you and test you, to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not. ³ So He humbled you, allowed you to hunger, and fed you with manna which you did not know nor did your fathers know, that He might make you know that man shall not live by bread alone; but man lives by every word that proceeds from the mouth of the LORD. ⁴ Your garments did not wear out on you, nor did your foot swell these forty years. ⁵ You should know in your heart that as a man chastens his son, so the LORD your God chastens you.

our lives are filled with many trials.  and some days may seem impossible.  certain situations may seem that they will be our undoing.

but they aren't.  the Lord wants to know what is our heart.  He humbles us.  But he doesn't leave us.

i am not filled with many more wisdomous words at this later hour.  but i believe this passage serves as a strong and loving reminder.  our lives will not be perfect, and we will experience pain- but it doesn't mean that the Lord is away from us.  He is right there.  And He wants us to know that we don't need what we think we need- we don't need bread alone- all we need is Him.  

Also from today's reading:

Deuteronomy 6: 4-10

⁴ “Hear, O Israel: The LORD our God, the LORD is one! ⁵ You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. 
⁶ “And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. ⁷ You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up. ⁸ You shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontlets between your eyes. ⁹ You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.

And that's all.  That's what matters.  I guess when I find myself feeling stumped on life, or wondering what or why or how- I can remember this.  It all comes down to this.