Tuesday, January 31, 2012


tuesday i fasted. i decided to fast on saturday. i had made some decisions for myself, and i felt confident in the Lord, but i wanted a day to totally focus on Him, which isn't always easy to do, so i thought if i fasted that would give an extra way to really generate my thoughts and prayers for Him.
it was awesome. truly joyful. just complete trust in Him. the Words of the Bible fed me, the counsel of others, the smiles of my children.
it was wonderful.
i am not sure it is normal for someone to be this happy in the Lord after something so terrible has happened. but i AM! He is a faithful God, a Sovereign God, and He is everything we need. and you know what- He provides, He is faithful, and when i find myself empty or tired or hungry, i can turn to Him.
its crazy just how joyful i felt during the fast. Closer to the Lord just through one little thing that i gave up. okay, so its a bigger thing, i do have a fond affection for food.
and donuts.
i might just fast donuts forever.
wait. no. don't hold me to that. donuts are good.
the fast. i am thankful for His loving kindness and His protection.
and i am thankful for where i am, through waiting- for food, for the next step, waiting on the Lord for whatever He may have, i have the opportunity to grow closer to Him, and let Him shape into the daughter of Christ that He wants me to be.
seriously?? how many people get such an awesome opportunity?
i am so thankful for the road i am on. the road that leads me closer to Jesus than i ever could have expected.
on a side note. i felt very pretty today.
and, i've now had two people who have talked to me say this, "what was he thinking messing with you?"...
well, you can't understand sin. so i'm not going to. i'm simply to spend my life loving the Lord, letting Him fill me up- because He seriously- SERIOUSLY- gives you everything you need.
its just weird.
and awesome.


  1. Knowing you're full of joy makes me very happy! While I read this, Judah is singing in his room, "my God is so great, so strong and so mighty, there's nothing my God can not do!" Out of the mouth of babes.

  2. Mary, reading through your journey has been so encouraging. We were praying for you tonight at Bible study and I am so grateful for the work God is doing in you.

  3. Mary, thank you for your posts! My husband chose to leave us after 8 years and I find myself in a very similar situation. I have grown closer to God than ever and it feels so good. It feels so good to give it up to him!

  4. So quiet since you posted this...